Other contestants include the buses packed to the ceiling with migrant workers, locals in their tricked out, fully tinted massive sedans or SUV's, and heavy haul transports. It's pedal to the metal (not joking at all) until the next red light where there is a nifty countdown until the next green light. We have 90 seconds and the contestants begin jockeying for position. You know darn well everyone is going to want to make a left hand turn but only two lanes are supposed to. The light goes green and all four lanes begin to turn BUT WAIT the Bangladeshi bus in lane 3 has decided that it's making a u-turn. LOOK OUT FOLKS we've got a train wreck (or rather a bus wreck) waiting to happen. Brake lights light up, horns start honking but this bus makes it though without any problems. Good thing he had his hazards on so we knew which way he was turning. Gotta love all of those nifty buttons inside the cab. Press em all and see what happens.
The freeway is now wide open and the contestants find their lanes accordingly. Of the three lanes on the freeway the speed varies by +/- 60 km/h. The middle lane usually drives the speed limit, the left lane does 20 over, the far left shoulder does 40+ over, the right lane does (at best) 20 under and the right shoulder is for accidents. Oh but wait, we've got a wreck approaching the Mall of Dhahran. Let's see what our contestants do. Brake lights and hazard lights come on (safety first...good thinking with the hazard lights!!!). The lines on the road mean nothing nothing and everyone is looking for the best lane to be in. This accident could be anywhere on the road so our contestants need to guess on which lane to be in. Our star, thinking quick on his feet, turn on the radio and starts flicking through the AM radio stations hoping to find the Saudi Arabian version of AM770 with traffic on the 1's. No such luck this morning. Gonna have to do this one by feel. Remember folks: rubbin's racin' and this morning is no different. When in doubt just follow the guy in front of you and leave some room cuz you know you're gonna get cut off. The three lanes have now transformed into nine lanes with both shoulders still raging at +/- mach chicken. This really is where the rubber meets the road folks and our star needs to find his way over to the right so he can catch his off ramp. Signal lights? Who needs em, just start inching over little by little and don't worry about swapping paint; we're all friends here, right??? Watch out for that shoulder lane though, it's really moving and you need to get into it if you're gonna make it to work sometime this century. Get your car angled properly, turn off the A/C to get a couple extra HP; left foot on the brake, right foot on the gas, RPM up to 4500, here comes a gap right before the Bangladeshi bus (different from the u-turn bus). LET 'ER GO BUCKAROO! Our star has safely made it to his off ramp and is cruising with easy toward the main compound. Who needs coffee when you've got this kind of adrenaline boost most mornings (or afternoons).
As our star nears his destination he encounters a strange and mystifying sign..."Driving School". They do that here?!? Could've fooled me! But wait...look closer...make a u-turn to go to driving school but right beside it a sign showing no u-turns allowed. No wonder driving is so confusing!!!
Stay tuned for the next edition of the Tracey Adventure as the kids start school and Kayden starts his new job as Tracey Translator. That's right people: who needs to learn French in grade 4 in Canada when you can learn Arabic in grade 1.
I think I had a panic attack just reading this! I would have so much road rage!
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